Just A Dream
by LiveandBreatheWords
Summary: Cowritten with iam97: They told her he was dead, that a bullet cost Peeta Mellark his life. Three years later, Katniss is married, but still trying to pick the pieces. What happens when evidence starts to form, when the pieces finally begin to come together? What if everything the they told her... Was a lie?
1. Prologue

**Authors Note: School isn't resuming for another week because of the weather. It was supposed to resume today, but according to the news nope. I'm going to try to update as much as I can with all my stories because of this delay. Heard Just A Dream by Carrie Underwood and this came to me. This song makes me cry every time. This first part was really hard to write and DISCLAIMER: I do not own this song. Read and review please!**

**BBree23***

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><p>Playlist:<p>

Just a Dream (obviously) by Carrie Underwood

Never Let Me Go by Florence and the Machine

Breathe by Taylor Swift

_Quote:_

_"There are things that we don't want to happen but have to accept, things we don't want to know but have to learn, and people we can't live without but have to let go. "_

_- Author Unknown_

_Prologue: Just A Dream_

The car jerked to a halt, they had arrived. Eighteen year old Katniss Everdeen stepped out, trying to avoid the cameras, trying to hide the tears. Haymitch Abernathy followed behind, keeping his head down, one arm rested protectively over Katniss, who appeared as though she would break down any minute. Rain came pouring down, the sky a dark shade of gray. Not a single glimpse of the sun, not the tinniest bit of light shone. She held a hand-carved box, full of letters he had written from the Capitol, telling of his progress, his life, even his love for her.

Each letter made her heart beat faster when she read them. It was as if she still had a piece of him with her. The thought made her want to cry. She would no longer feel his arms around her, the touch of his lips, his smile that could make her forget nearly everything bad that had happened in just the past two years of her life.

She had taken him for granted, never thinking that one day, he could leave her. That one day she would have to face the nightmares alone. And now, worse had come to worse.

Peeta Mellark was dead.

_It was two weeks after the day she turned eighteen_

_All dressed in white, goin' to the church that night,_

_She had his box of letters in the passenger seat,_

_Six pence in a shoe, somethin' borrowed, somethin' blue_

She gripped the flowers tightly, thinking of when he picked some for her when they were coming home. From the first games, coming back from District 12. It was then that she confessed that her love was some sort of an act. Throughout that period, her feelings for him ranged from anger to passion, sorrow to love. Katniss could never describe their relationship, the way he made her feel.

She returned to District 12 after the war, only this time, he was not by her side. They kept in touch, phone, letters. It was not the same as having him there, but she knew they would be reunited soon. It was that thought that kept her going through the horrible therapy sessions, fight through the raging nightmares that would never leave.

_And when the church doors opened up wide_

_She put the veil down, tryin' to hide the tears_

_Oh, she just couldn't believe it_

_She heard the trumpets from the military band_

_And the flowers fell right out of her hands_

They fell to the floor, the impact made no sound, but it was as if Katniss had been stabbed in her heart. The rain washed them away, the colors looking awkward in the gray cement. She could hold it no longer, she fell to the floor, and did something she had never done before.

She wept.

_Baby, why'd you leave me? Why'd you have to go?_

_I was countin' on forever, now I'll never know_

_I can't even breathe_

Memories flashed, images racing through her mind. Every replay made her cry harder. She didn't want to do this, she didn't want to let him go. Because once she let go of him, she let go a part of herself, the part that wasn't broken. After the death of her sister, the loss of nearly everyone she loved, Katniss Everdeen had been damaged severely. It was Peeta, and it would always be him, that could make her feel whole again.

_It's like I'm looking' from the distance, standin' in the background_

_Everybody's sayin' he's not comin' home now_

_This can't be happenin' to me,_

_This is just a dream_

Haymitch pulled her up, his expression grim. He did not know how much pain she was in, how long it would take her to move past this. He only knew this would affect them both greatly, that boy had made a great change in their lives. After his Games, the Capitol killed everyone he loved. He felt as though nobody could ever care for him again, that he would always be like this. A person nobody wanted.

Peeta Mellark had proved him wrong.

_The preacher man said, "Let's bow our heads and pray"_

_Lord please lift his soul, and heal this hurt_

_Then the congregation all stood up and sang_

_The saddest song that she ever heard_

_Then they handed her a folded up flag_

_and she held on to all she had left of him_

_Oh, and what could've been_

_And then the guns rang one last shot_

_And it felt like a bullet in her heart_

She couldn't take it, she couldn't handle this. And with that, Katniss Everdeen ran out of the church and into the pouring rain. Her mother saw this, already planning to follow her. But Haymitch held her back.

"She needs to be alone right now," he told her, his voice cracked.

Mrs. Everdeen nodded, tears forming in her eyes. She hated to see her daughter like that, so hurt, so depressed. Prim's death had affected her greatly, but this boy's death... It was uncalled for. And just after a few months of recovery, they had received the news. And now, she was well on the verge of losing both her children.

_Baby, why'd you leave me? Why'd you have to go?_

_I was countin' on forever, now I'll never know_

_I can't even breathe_

She sat on the soft ground, her dress now covered with mud. Katniss was holding herself together, her head in her hands. This can't be real, she told herself, this has to be a dream. But how much longer would it last? She had already been asleep to long. She would not let reality settle, knowing that as soon as she realized it, her life was over. The one boy she'd come to love was dead, their future shattered. What did you do when everyone you loved was gone? Could you feel any emotions, experience life if you lost your reason for living?

_It's like I'm looking' from the distance, standin' in the background_

_Everybody's sayin' he's not comin' home now_

_This can't be happenin' to me,_

_This is just a dream_

Her pulse quickened, her breath was becoming shallow. She felt as if she was in dark water, a huge weight pulling her down. How could she ever reach the surface? Peeta was the one person who could pull her up, save her from drowning. But now... there was no other option. She would sink until she hit the bottom.

_Ooh baby, why'd you leave me, why'd you have to go?_

_I was countin' on forever, now I'll never know_

_Oh, I'll never know_

She laid down, tears still rushing down her face. There was nothing in her life now. Nothing.

_It's like I'm looking' from the distance, standin' in the background_

_Everybody's sayin' he's not comin' home now_

_This can't be happenin' to me,_

_This is just a dream_

"He's dead," she whispered, "he's dead."

_Oh, this is just a dream_

_It's just a dream, yeah, yeah_

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><p><strong>Authors Note: What'd you think? Should I continue with this?<strong>

**BBree23***


	2. Chapter 1: Reaching Out

**Authors Note: I didn't think I could update it, but somehow I managed! Thanks for the responses, I appreciate them. Just a note this story will be in third person, no first person. Hope you like it and review please! Sorry it's pretty short, but it will be longer later.**

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><p>Chapter 1: Reaching Out<p>

Gale Hawthorne stepped out of the car, the cold air hitting him immediately. He buttoned up his jacket, barely making his way towards the door. He hadn't seen Katniss in nearly a year. But after he saw how she acted during Peeta Mellark's funeral, he could wait no longer. It did not matter if she hated him, for she needed comfort. She needed support. And friend or lover, he was willing to do just that.

He knocked on the door, afraid of her reaction. She didn't respond to any of his letters, did not answer any phone calls he had made, did she shut him out of her life completely? He thought of the day they first met, back in the woods. An uncomplicated friendship, just two people. Gale did not appreciate it when he realized he had fallen for his best friend. She had always told him she did not want a boyfriend, marriage, or even children. And until the first time she went into the arena, he had believed her.

The way he looked at her... it hurt him, cut him up like a knife. But what could he do? The boy was dead now, and though Gale did not really miss him, he meant a lot to Katniss, meaning that this task would not be easy.

The door opened, the girl standing before him was not the same. She looked at him, shocked, as though this could not be happening. They stood, face to face, outside in the pouring rain for what seemed like hours. He studied her, exhausted, hungry, but most of all, alone.

_She's worse, he thought, she's so much worse._

Katniss woke up, her bed empty. It terrified her in the beginning, being alone, but eventually she got used to it. Gale had a job in District 2, something that paid well, but meant he was over there, even months at a time. She felt guilty, not being able to say she missed him, that she loved him. Gale knew, and accepted that her heart would always belong to Peeta, that his death damaged her the most.

But it didn't stop him from proposing. She talked to her mother about it, who left it up to her. Katniss could not make the decision alone though. The talk with Haymitch was the hardest. There had been many tears during that conversation, sometimes at the very mention of his name. He said that Peeta would have wanted her to be happy, to move on with life.

Haymitch had recieved a letter from him, but when he saw it closely, he found that it was meant for her. Addressed to Katniss, meant to be given when the time was right. She locked it up, never letting it cross her mind again. She tried to distract herself, hunting daily, adding editions to her father's plant book, even deciding to sing. It did not work. It was as if everything she did brought back memories of him.

Three days ago she had opened the letter, three days ago had she tossed it into the fire, only to pull it back out. The edges were burnt, some of the ink unreadable. But the message was the same:

_September 21_

_Dear Katniss,_

_I can't tell you when and where I fell in love with you, whether it was the first day of school, or the time you volunteered for Prim. It started out as a crush, but throughout the years, it developed into something indefinitely more precious. I'd count the days until we see each other again, but it would only drive me mad knowing that we'd still be apart for some time. In the last letter, you asked how I put up with all of this. The sessions, the endless medications, being stuck in this hospital room with no visitors whatsoever. The answer is you._

_I love you Katniss Everdeen, no matter what may have happened between us. I don't need for us to be together. I want you to be happy, and if that means being with Gale, then so be it. If it means being alone, then you do it. If it means being with me, I'll welcome it. When they rescued me from the Capitol, I didn't know who to trust. They got the best of me, even you. I didn't know what to think, my memories were altered. It was as if my entire world had been ripped apart._

_I'm not the same boy who gave you the bread. But I'm not the same monster who attacked you either. I'm the guy who fell for you, time and time again. After the Games, I still loved you. Everything we've been through, I never stopped._

_We may be apart in distance, but you'll always be with me in my heart._

_I love you,_

_Peeta Mellark_

It was then, that moment, that changed nearly everything. She read the date, and analyzed it in her head. September 21, a month before he should have been released. The date ran through her head, trapping her, digging deeper and deeper into her thoughts until it all came together. A missing piece to a puzzle. A missing piece to her heart.

September 21, a week after Peeta Mellark was announced dead.

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><p><strong>Authors Note: What did you think? Horrible, nice, strange? Review please!<strong>


	3. Chapter 2: The Key

**Authors Note: So sorry, but I found a way to make this fit in chapter 2. I always try to use the replace chapter thing, but whenever I click on it, it keeps saying error something. So I have to delete it and start over. It's been that way for a while now, and I'm starting to think its just my computer... Anyways, sorry once more! R&R please**

**BBree23***

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><p>Gale boarded the train along with the crowd, his expression nervous. Katniss was calm when they talked on the phone, but he heard the anxiety in her voice, the worry. The conversation flashed through his head, making him just as concerned as the first time.<p>

"Gale!" Katniss said, relieved. She hadn't called. In fact, she never called. Gale bolted upright.

"Katniss, what's wrong?" he had asked, hoping she was alright.

"Do you think you can come home?" he knew it wasn't a question, a statement. She needed him.

"Sure, I'll be on the next train." Gale was about to hang up when he paused, "Katniss, are you okay? If there's anything wrong —"

"There's nothing," she said abruptly, too quick, too soon, "I miss you."

Even though it cut him deep, Gale knew it wasn't true. They were friends, best friends, but that was all they ever could be. He tried to help her, but there was something about his old hunting partner's heart that wasn't open anymore. She cared about him, but not like she did for Prim... not like she did for Peeta.

He didn't let his voice crack though, "I miss you too," he smiled, "I'll see you soon," he added.

"Gale, I need to tell you something," Katniss blurted. He could hear Haymitch's voice in the background. They argued for a minute, then he came on.

"Listen son, you need to get over here. Now." Haymitch said, and the line went dead.

Gale had wanted to be friends from the beginning. The twelve year old girl had a natural talent with the bow and arrow. He knew if they worked together, they could probably bring in twice as much for their family. It did not matter though. Katniss pushed him away. It took time for her to trust him, to cooperate with him.

And yet, when she went into the arena, it was completely different. She had told Gale it was all an act, she was faking to get sponsors. But he saw how he looked at her, how she looked at him. Peeta Mellark, the baker's son, the boy who had given Katniss the bread, the very loaves that had kept her alive. And now, Peeta Mellark, the boy who had died, who left her wounded.

Or so she thought. That's what everyone thought. That is what all of Panem thought.

But Gale Hawthorne knew better.

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><p>Katniss paced back and forth, clutching the letter tightly in her hands. How could she explain this to Gale? He would be upset just by the fact that she thought he was alive. He would deny it, tell her she's losing it or something. Maybe even call the doctor for a session. But a small part of her hoped he would be supportive. That he would help her put pieces together, and in just a while, she'd see Peeta Mellark's sky blue eyes once more.<p>

Yet, what would become of them? She spent all night awake, lying in her bed. Just thinking, wondering if Peeta could be alive, if that was even a possibility. She didn't take anyone else's feelings into consideration. For once in her life, she allowed herself to be happy, not having to stress over how it could affect those she loved. And now, the consequences were to be paid.

Haymitch walked in, a bottle of liquor in one hand, a gun in the other. Katniss just stared, puzzled. He turned to her and shrugged, "It could turn ugly." The thought that Haymitch would be there was comforting. Haymitch drunk and handling a gun... not the same feeling.

"Haymitch, do you think it could be true?" Asked Katniss hopefully.

"Sweetheart," He wanted to tell her not to to get her hopes up, but when he saw the gleam in her eyes, the smile on her face, he just couldn't do it, "anything's possible."

She hadn't been like this in a long time. They both knew it. But for some reason, this letter gave her hope. It was as if Peeta was still with her, encouraging her. She enjoyed the feeling.

"Sweetheart, can I ask you a question?"

Katniss nodded, the smile fading. "Sure."

"Why is this so important to you dear? It's important to me too, but your reaction... Katniss you haven't smiled in months."

"Haymitch, when my father died, my family went through a rough state. It was Peeta that gave me hope. During the Games, he was there, protecting me, willing to risk his life for someone he barely knew—"

"He loved you sweetheart," Haymitch reminded her, his words slurred.

"Even love can reach its breaking point," said Katniss, continuing, "The Quarter Quell, he did the same. And even after all I put him through, even after all those times I hurt him, he saved my life once more by not letting me swallow the nightlock."

" Gale and I, he's my best friend, I love him... but we're both fire. We have anger and heartbreak from our past that, together cannot be tended. Peeta keeps me going though. And when he died, I felt as if I had been put out. With all the people I lost... I thought, at least I would have him. But even he was taken away from me," Katniss responded, trying not to think of the funeral.

"I've done nothing good to deserve this. But yet, there's a chance he could be alive. And after all we've been through, I have to believe that life will get better. And this," she gestures towards the letter, "I believe this is sign."

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><p><strong>Authors Note: Hope you enjoyed it, if not tell me how I can improve it. Review or PM!<strong>

**BBree23***


	4. Chapter 3: Questions

**Authors Note: Here's an update! Thanks to those who offered, you guys are all excellent writers, but I chose iam97. Anyways, she wrote this chapter. She's really an amazing writer! Hope you like it! Read and review please!**

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>Chapter 3: Questions<p><p>

Katniss sat awake in her bed.

That was everything she had done in the past twenty-four hours, really. While looking at it and re-reading it a new thought had come to her. She didn't know with whom he is or what he has done since then. She also didsn't know where he was. The last information she had received was that he was in the Capitol, but that was almost half a year ago.

This realization made her swallow. Half a year. What could have happened? Why hadn't he written again, why hadn't he told her he's alive?

Yes, alive. How come he was alive? How come he was alive and not there? How come he had been announced dead yet this letter gave her hope that Peeta Mellark was still alive? He had to be out of hospital now, his hijacking must have been treated to a point where he won't try to kill her.

So why wasn't he back? This was the question nagging Katniss most. Why? She wanted to scream out. Why aren't you here, why aren't you with me? Why did they tell me you're dead?

She didn't know the answers, neither did she know how to find him, nor where to begin searching.

But she did believe that he was alive. She had to. Hoping it because of the letter and then finding out it isn't true would be too much for her. She couldn't live with it. She couldn't lose him again.

A knock on the door snapped her out of her thoughts.

Katniss shortly wondered who this could be. The light of the rising sun, seeable even through the closed curtains, told her that the night is over, but who would visit her, the victor of the 74th Hunger Games, this early? Surely not Haymitch. He was probably having a hangover. Or he was still sleeping.

Then she got a new idea. Katniss felt her smile growing, her eyes starting to shine. What if it was Peeta? What if it really was the person she was missing the most?

But then she remembered. Remembered what she had done right after reading the letter. Of course. How could she have forgotten? She already felt the disappointment. It wasn't Peeta. Of course not. It was Gale. When she parted the curtains and glanced through the window, she saw his dark brown hair.

She rushed down the stairs to open the door. She needed him now, after this discovery. He knew how she felt about Peeta. More like, about his death. And what was he going to tell her when she told him she thinks he was still alive?

Would he think she was crazy or would he think she is right? Wait. Hadn't she not wanted to tell him? She couldn't. He would surely think she was crazy and she would never get his help to find Peeta. No, she had to think of a better way.

Katniss opened the door, a small smile playing her lips. Even though it wasn't Peeta she was glad to see him. She had missed him, even if it wasn't exactly the way he wanted her to.

"Catnip!", he exclaimed with a smile and hugged her. Katniss returned it, glad to have him with her again.

"Hey Gale." He gave her a strange look. Katniss didn't know why though. She wasn't that different now, was she?

"Katniss, why are you smiling like that?" His eyes locked with hers, grey orbs that could always read her mind.

"Is it because of me? Or is it something else?" When he said the first words he looked not only hopeful but also doubting. Katniss wondered if he thought she wasn't happy about him being here.

"Of course I'm happy you're here." She told him. "I…there's something I need your help with."

She led him into her house and offered him to sit down on the couch with her.

"So, what do you need my help with?" He asked after a few uncomfortable seconds of silence. Katniss didn't know how to start, since she didn't want to tell him about Peeta.

"Of course I'm happy you're here." She told him. "I…there's something I need your help with."

She led him into her house and offered him to sit down on the couch with her.

"So, what do you need my help with?" He asked after a few uncomfortable seconds of silence. Katniss didn't know how to start, since she didn't want to tell him about Peeta.

"I…how do you find someone if you haven't had any contact with this person in month?" Her choice of words wasn't the best but they had never been her talent either way. They had been Peeta's.

She almost sighted. If she had done that he would surely have asked why. But she couldn't have answered him, because the reason was that it reminded her of Peeta. Many things did. Especially since he died. It was worst first when she had started crying because of a dandelion or a simple loaf of bread.

Gale gave her a confused look. "Who are you talking about? Delly's in District 4 and so are you mother, Annie and her son. Johanna is either in 7 or in 4, visiting Annie and helping her raise the baby. I hope you do know where Haymitch lives and if not, he's your neighbor. My family also lives here in twelve. Who else could it…?" He trailed off, his face suddenly revealing shock.

At least for a few seconds. After that it was replaced by confusion. But there had been something. This shock, where had it come from? Did he know what she thought about Peeta?

Katniss recalled our conversation, the one they had had on the phone. No, she hadn't let it slip. So what was it? He simply couldn't know about Peeta, though that was the only logical explanation.

Katniss had looked away from his face but when she looked back at it she saw a suspicious look on his face, but also a questioning. And that shocked again. Again, or still?

He sure wasn't the only one having questions now. "Gale, why do you look so shocked?"

"I don't!" He replied, showing her that confused face a again. She would have bought it, if only she hadn't seen the other expression.

"I'm only wondering about your friend. Who is it, how come I don't know him? Or her?" He tried to change the topic, but Katniss wasn't giving up that easy. Much had changed during the war and the Hunger Games, especially her personality, but she was still stubborn. Determined to get her answer.

"Gale don't lie to me. You can tell me, you know?" She wasn't sure if she would like his answer, but it sure couldn't be worse than not telling her. This strangely reminded her of the time when no one told her about Peeta's second propo. How betrayed she had felt when she found out they had known it and not told her.

"You first." She remembered what she had told Haymitch yesterday. About her and him being fire. How right she had been. And still was. This was the perfect example.

When she didn't reply he decided to talk again. "Listen, you wanted my help. And now all we do is fighting again. I really want to help you, but you have to tell me who you want to find, otherwise it won't be possible."

Hearing his words, she remembered how much she depended on his help. He was an appreciated man and he had connections that could help him find anyone. If only he would tell her who to ask.

"I don't know. The name, I mean. I just want to find her. Could you tell me who could help me?" Katniss thought that it would be easier to convince him to help her find Peeta if she pretended she was searching a girl. Gale wouldn't be jealous that way.

He looked at her in disbelieve. "You don't know the name? You do know that it will be very hard, if not impossible, to find her under those circumstances. Why do you even want to find her?"

This was going to be a lot more difficult than she had thought. She already prepared for a long, difficult search after someone who might not be alive.

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><p><strong>Authors Note: What did you think? Review please!<strong>


	5. Chapter 4: News

**Authors Note: Update time! I wrote this chapter, hope you guys like it! I'll update my other story Broken probably next week. It's still cold, but things are warming up. Go ahead and read! Review please! Also note that it may be short, but I felt this was all that could really be incorporated for Chapter 4.**

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****Warning: Short Chapter ahead ****

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><p><p>

Chapter 4:

Gale looked at Katniss, as if trying to read through her thoughts. How could she explain to him? He would think she was crazy, or even worse, that she wanted to leave him. She preferred solitude, she wanted solitude, but she wanted Gale in her life. Katniss loved him, she knew, but as she loves her mother, as she loved Prim.

Not like she loved Peeta.

She needed a best friend right now, and Gale, husband or not, had always been her, did not involve the baker's son. Katniss took a deep breath, "Wait here."

She hurried into her room. It was Gale's too, but he was usually gone. Katniss had learned to live like this, have nobody to hold her when she had a bad dream, when she just couldn't take it anymore. But it didn't stop the nightmares from coming.

Katniss hid the letter in a box her father had carved as a gift many years ago. It was one of the very few gifts her mother turned down during the years of their marriage. She remembered him presenting it to her, how her mother was pregnant at the time. She went through mood swings throughout the time she was carrying Prim, but that day she had been furious.

They had just come home from the woods. It was during the period when her father was teaching her how to swim. He had taught her the words to the hanging tree, and together they sang, all the birds near stopped to listen. She was young, she was naïve. Katniss didn't understand the lyrics then, but when she saw her mother's expression when she heard her daughter, she knew they meant something wrong.

They had gotten into a fight that day, her father and mother. It was the only time they argued, but right way, it struck Katniss deeply. A few years later, a similar incident occurred, only this time Prim had been involved. She could hear her father's voice, singing those very words that sounded so beautiful, but meant destruction.

The word hadn't resurfaced in a while. Destruction meant nightmares, usually involving Presient Snow. It was easier when someone was around to calm her down. But for the past three years, nobody took the position.

Katniss had the box in her hands now, carrying it as if it were an infant. Something that had to be taken care of, fragile, something she could not drop.

Gale saw her as soon as she went back into the living room, the worried look still registered on his face. He smiled when she walked in, but it was fatal, delicate. Without word, Katniss reached in the box and gave him the letter.

He was done reading the letter, but the pain was still there, "Katniss, what are you trying to say?"

"I think Peeta may be alive." Gale left abruptly, shutting the door behind.

Images of the good times with Peeta replayed through her mind. Her doctor said to do this whenever she was upset. But she couldn't stop thinking of Gale, if he would ever come back.

One thing she noticed: he hadn't looked her in the eye.

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><p><p>

_Peeta Mellark sat in the chair, exhausted. He was bruised and beaten, but after a full days work, they left him alone in his cell. He remembered when they told him it was just a few more months._

_Just a few more weeks until he could go home. Until he could see Katniss. _

_Those weeks turned into months, turning into years. They faked his death, he remembered seeing the recap of the funeral. He hated seeing it, all the people he cared for, all the people he loved, crying. Crying for someone who didn't deserve to die._

_Crying for someone who wasn't really dead._

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><p><p>

**Authors Note: So, what did you think? Review please!**

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	6. Chapter 5: In Detail

**Authors Note: Thanks for support! This chapter was written by iam97, hope you enjoy it! And to Madison Mellark, happy belated birthday! Read and review please!**

****BBree23* ****

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><p><p>

_"I think Peeta may be alive."_

When Gale had heard those words everything around him had stopped moving, had stopped having meaning. Just those words coming out of the mouth of his wife had mattered.

Gale had immediately stormed out of the room, the house, everything. He hadn't known what to do, where to go, what to think.

Only this sentence had kept buzzing around in his head the whole time.

Gale still couldn't believe it. He had seen the date on the letter. Of course, that's what had made her suspicious. What he didn't know is how they could have sent this one after Peeta Mellark was declared dead.

It was impossible that Mellark had found a way to do it. He had to be in this room twenty-four-seven. He simply couldn't have sent it.

Gale still didn't know whose idea it had been to say that he had died. He had seen how it had hurt Katniss and he had been tempted to tell her Mellark wasn't really dead. After all, Gale really loved Katniss.

But then his selfishness had taken over. He had realized that this meant he could have Katniss all to himself. He could marry her. He thought that maybe she would love him eventually.

This idea had been so tempting he hadn't been able to resist. And it had all played out, except he didn't know if she really loved him.

Until now, that was. Now that she had read that stupid, stupid letter. If only she had never opened it. She would've died believing Peeta was dead. Maybe she would have forgotten him.

But no, there had to be one stupid date to ruin everything. To make her believe that the man she really loved was still alive. If only it was a vein hope, if only it was not true. If only he could have looked her in the eye and told her Peeta Mellark was dead and there was no chance he'd ever be alive again. That he was gone.

But he wasn't and Gale couldn't lie to her. Not again. Not when she was so full of hope, not when she confronted him so directly, not when he was so perplexed.

So Gale had done the only thing he had been able to think of. He run. Run to the trainstation.

And he stepped on a train and was now sitting in a compartment, an empty compartment. He was on a train heading to the Capitol.

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><p>Katniss stared out the window, trying to figure out where he had gone. What was wrong with Gale? She had thought he would…she didn't know. Maybe think she was insane? Shout at her for being so stupid? Have a jealousy fit?<p>

But surely not that. Not this fight. Not this storming out of her house, this refusal to look in her eyes.

It wasn't the only thing bugging her. How could he, her husband, no matter if she was in love with him or not, leave her like that? When she needed him? He had promised to be there for her!

Katniss sighted. Was it her fault? After everything she had out him through, had he finally lost it? Finally realized that she was a lost cause? Did he think Katniss was hallucinating now?

Or was there something else?

Katniss stopped dead in tracks. Had she really just thought that? Had she really just assumed that Gale…knew? Knew that Peeta was still alive and hadn't told her?

Katniss shook her head, angry at herself for those thoughts. He was her best friend! He would never do that to her! He couldn't.

That weren't really reasons though and it was driving Katniss crazy. She now actually thought that her best friend, her husband, the man who claimed that he always wanted only the best for her, had something to do with this. With Peeta's disappearing.

Katniss fell back onto the sofa, head in her hands. She really was horrible. And insane, too. She trusted Gale. She had trusted him since they became friends. She had even forgiven him for the incident with the bombs. She had married him. So why couldn't he trust her?

There was something he was hiding. She knew it. There was no other reason why he hadn't looked her in the eyes. She knew Gale. Or so she thought. She had always been able to read his thoughts, so why not now?

Her head shoot up, determination in her eyes. If Gale wouldn't help her, she would find Peeta alone. It wouldn't be the fist time she would do something all by herself, really.

She looked out of the window. Somewhere out there was Peeta. He had to be.

Right then her gaze fell on a house. Of course. Hoe hadn't she thought of it earlier? She didn't have to do it on her own. She hadn't done it on her own in the Games either. She still had her old mentor.

Haymitch Abernathy. And he would help her, like he did in the Games. Like he did in the war.

Katniss came to her feet. She knew it. Haymitch loved Peeta, too. And no matter what he said, she knew he hoped Peeta Mellark was still alive. She had seen hope in his eyes when she had shown the letter to him.

So she went to his home. She just needed a piece of information, really. Just like a small gift in the Games. Just some helpful advice.

"Haymitch!" She called. As soon as she entered she could smell the liquor. Perfect. He was probably having a hangover and when she woke him up he would surely be in a bad mood.

Oh well. This was Haymitch. When was he ever in a good mood?

"HAYMITCH!" She yelled. And then she saw him, just like she expected. A knife in his hand, ready to kill whoever was disrupting his sleep and a disgusting smell coming from his whole body.

She knew it was no use to try and shake him awake.

So she filled a bucket with water and splashed it over his whole face. When he took a swing with his knife in her direction she actually smiled. There were some things that never changed. And after all Katniss had been through and, if she was honest with herself, was about to go through, it was a relief to have those average things. Try to wake Haymitch and be prepared for his attempt to kill you.

"What are you doing here?" He snarled. Katniss only rolled her eyes.

I came to ask you something." She told him.

"Aha. Sooo…that's what you had to wake me up for? Why not wait till I wake up without getting a cold?"

"Because I need my answer today and now, and not next week. And now shut up and listen!" Haymitch was about to retort something, but she wouldn't let him.

"Remember the letter I told you about a few days ago?" Without waiting for an answer she continued. "The one from Peeta. And…what I guessed. That…that he isn't dead. "

"Well…I decided I want to find him. I'll search for him but…I don't know where he was. Before they declared him dead, you know. So…where was he, Haymitch?"

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><p><p>

**Authors Note: What did you think? Review please! **

**BBree23* **


	7. Chapter 6: Secrets

**Authors Note: Two updates in one day! Hope this clears up some things, for those of you who asked. This chapter I finished since we have nothing to do today except watch the Patriots get their butts kicked! Super Bowl! Read and review please!**

**BBree23***

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><p>Chapter 6.<p>

Katniss woke up screaming from a nightmare. This one had been the worst she had this entire week. They were back in the arena, her and Peeta. Only this time, he had fallen off the Cornucopia, all the air knocked out of him.

She screamed his name repeatedly, but he was unconscious. Katniss tried to move, tried to save him, but she we paralyzed. Then the mutts attacked. Tears ran down her cheeks as she told herself over and over to relax. It was just a dream.

She ached for him, to be able to see him smile, hear his laugh. Feel his arms go around her protectively. For Peeta Mellark to look at her as if they were the last two people on Earth. All these years he had crossed her mind. Not a day went by that she didn't think about him, knowing she would never see him again.

Now it's different, she told herself, there's a chance he could be alive.

Tomorrow they would journey to District 4 and visit his grave. Haymitch told her not to get her hopes up, but she could see the light in his eyes when she asked him to accompany her. If anyone was to go, she would have wanted her old mentor there by her side.

He could not pretend he didn't miss him. It was hard on the both of them. But now, everything could change. Katniss remembered the conversation they had earlier, how he made it clear where they should begin.

She never understood why Peeta was buried in District 4 until Katniss read his will. Though it did not sound like him, she didn't question it. She was still in shock, still mourning over his loss. She was over that now. They would visit the grave, request permission to bring it above ground. It was not in the Capitol's power, it was in hers. They didn't let her see the body. Told her to keep away for they feared she wouldn't be able to control herself, for it really was gruesome.

She had not questioned it then. However, she questioned it now...

What if there really was no body?

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><p>Gale exited the train, trying to avoid the unwanted attention from the Capitol citizens. He walked the streets, unsure of what to do next. He knew it was wrong to walk out on Katniss, especially after what she had said to him. She could become suspicious, and that was something they could not afford at this point.<p>

He missed Katniss, surely she must know that. He missed how she used to be. The girl he met in the woods was not sere anymore. Katniss would never be that girl again. And could he blame her? Life didn't change, people do. She was no longer the girl he thought he knew.

He thought of the time he recieved the papers, offering him the job in District 2. It was then when he woke up on the train that he realized they never planned to take him to District 2. They were headed for the Capitol.

Nothing had made sense then. They held him hostage, tortured him until he feared he would die, until he wished to die. The guards did not grant any mercy, did not take pity on him. It was those weeks that he found out how cruel the Capitol could really be.

Their first meeting was what had triggered it all. Gale refused to take part in it, for the rebels had spent all these years trying to bring down the Capitol, take down the Games. They had succeeded, but that moment, he found out all of it had gone to waste.

President Snow was alive.

"Not possible," Gale whispered when he had laid eyes on the very man that didn't deserve to die. He deserved to be tortured, year after year, until the final moment where he pleaded for forgiveness, it would not be granted.

"Mr. Hawthorne, a pleasure," he extended his hand. Gale threw himself at him, shouting insults, hitting him, giving him a taste of his own medicine.

The guards pulled him away then. President Snow, wiping blood off his face, only smiled. Gale looked at him, disgusted, "You ass! Why aren't you rotting in hell?"

"Anyone can fake their own death, Mr. Hawthorne." he offered it then, only to have Gale refuse and spit on his face.

It was offered several times after that. One day, it became to much. Bruised and beaten, Gale Hawthorne finally gave in. He would help them fake Mellark's death. He would help them gain back what President Snow claimed was rightfully his. Once again, they could be on the verge of war.

He promised Gale he wouldn't regret it. For Gale Hawthorne would get what he always wanted, what he could only dream of having.

Katniss Everdeen.

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><p><strong>Authors Note: What did you think? Note, I wouldn't be able to write and update like this all the time. :) hope you liked it. As always, suggestions, comments, and questions are welcome. Review or PM and we will answer them!<strong>

**BBree23***

**Have you guys seen the latest Hunger Games trailer? **


	8. Chapter 7: Light goes down

**Authors Note: Hey! Here's an update! Iam97 wrote this chapter, hope you guys like it. As reviews comments, suggestions or questions are welcome. Review please, and if you want, go check out our other stories!**

**BBree23***

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><p>Chapter 7:<p>

Peeta stared at the walls around him. They were white, plain and simple. Just like his life. Peeta Mellark had nothing left. Well, aside from the scars that covered his body. And He has counted them numerous times by now. It was the only thing he could do, really.

A few years ago he would remember. Remember his old life. The bakery. His family. And then there were also the images of Katniss in his head. But they were always followed by the Games and the war, sometimes by images of her killing him.

Peeta didn't know why.

Dr. Aurelius had told him his hijacking relapses should be over. That he, at least, should be able to know it was not real when they happened. But when he had them, he didn't know what was real and what wasn't.

Of course, that was a time where they would torture him every day. Peeta suspected that it was kind of a déjà vu, after all he had been tortured while they hijacked him, too. The hijacking was a torture itself, but more of a psychical than a physical one. Although he did remember pain while they inserted the venom. That was what he told himself to keep him sane, to let him believe that he wasn't a mutation but still a human being.

Sometimes he doesn't think he succeeded. If he was completely honest, it happened quite often lately. When he would wake up screaming form a nightmare, or just starts screaming because of the images in his head, he did think he had lost it.

Then someone from the Capitol would always come in to sedate him. From the old, the real Capitol, the one he's grown up with. When they first told him he couldn't believe it.

Snow was dead. Or so Peeta had thought. He had seen it himself, his body, his coffin. But obviously, Snow wasn't really dead. Because a few years ago the former president of Panem, Coriolanus Snow, had stepped into Peeta's cell for the first time, as alive and cruel as ever.

No, Peeta hadn't been able to believe it. He had been shouting at him, had wanted to hit him, to kill him. But Snow just laughed and said he wasn't the one who was going to be killed.

He told him it was Peeta who would be killed. The same way he had been killed. Then, because Peeta had panicked, thinking it was Katniss having to shoot him with an arrow, he had smiled and said:

"No, Mr. Mellark. Not like that. As you can see, I'm healthy and alive and well. As well as one can be those days. No, Mr. Mellark. You're not going to die. Well, you will not be dead. But that's what the whole world is going to think. Yes, even our beloved Miss Everdeen."

At the mention of Katniss, Peeta had wanted to interfere, to protest, to shout at him again, but Snow hadn't let him.

"No need to worry about her though. I'm sure she will find comfort in her…handsome cousin."

The way he had said the word cousin had made it clear that he knew Gale wasn't her cousin. It wasn't as though Peeta hadn't known that before, but to hear it from Snow like that had hurt him.

That had of course been the intention. They knew he missed Katniss. They knew he wanted to go back to her, they knew that was what he needed. Peeta was still talking in his sleep, that much Dr. Aurelius had told him.

But then he had realized how selfish it was of him to wish to be with Katniss. And he knew that Gale was way better for her anyway. Gale wasn't as broken, and most importantly, he hadn't been hijacked. Peeta knew he should just be happy for Katniss. That was what he had always wanted, wasn't it? For her to be happy, no matter what it would do to himself?

Over the few years he'd been in his prison, he had found his peace with this thought. To know that Katniss was safe. For now, at least.  
>Peeta didn't know about Snow's plans. Of course they wouldn't tell him. Peeta didn't know what was going on around him. He didn't even knew where he was.<p>

It was easier to tell what he did know. His name was Peeta Mellark. He had been imprisoned for over three years now. He was twenty years old. He had been hijacked by the Capitol. And he was still in love with Katniss Everdeen.

He sighed. Actually, he wasn't sure about the last thing. Not about his love for her. But her name could very well be Katniss Hawthorne by now. He liked to cling to that hope though, that selfishness inside him, that said she was still Katniss Everdeen, still waiting for him.

That thought was foolish and of course Peeta knew that, too. Who would wait for a dead man? And after three years…? Not very likely.

At first he had had hope. At first he had thought that maybe his letter, the one he managed to send after he had been declared dead, would maybe make her realize that he wasn't really dead. He had been so glad that Dr. Aurelius had actually agreed to help him, despite the dangers it brought. He had said that he would try.

Now there were many scenarios that could have happened. For once, it was a possibility that they had found out about the letter and arrested Dr. Aurelius, what would make sense, since Peeta hasn't seen him since that day.

But Katniss could have ignored it too, or at least not seen the date. The outcome was the same. Katniss didn't know about him being here, imprisoned. She most likely never would. He would sit in this cell until he died for real.

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><p>Authors Note: Thanks for reading :) review please<p>

BBree23*


	9. Chapter 8: Out

Peeta Mellark jolted awake, already sweating from a nightmare. He felt his heart race, and tried to calm himself down. It had all seemed so real, but he was awake now. Everything was okay. But deep inside, he knew it was a lie. It was never going to be okay. He was always going to be locked up in this cell, away from the only people he had left in this world. He had seen the funeral, how broken they had looked. It made him cringe, it made him want to bust out of this place and rush back home. Back to safety. But most of all, back to Katniss.

Suddenly, from the small window on the front door, he saw the light switch had been turned on. Not even the guards rose at this time. It was pitch black outside, not even the tinest trace of light in the sky. Something was going on. Something was wrong.

As if time had stopped, his door was being open, slowly but quietly, as if they did not want to disturb. His grey eyes scanned the room, and when they fell onto Peeta, he couldn't help but smirk.

"Gale?" his voice cracked from just the terror and utter joy of seeing a person who wasn't out to kill him.

Gale had changed since the last time Peeta had seen him. He hadn't changed very much in appearance, but by the way he walked, the way he smiled, something just wasn't right. He was cautious, careful, as if unsure whether or not to trust Peeta. _That should be me, _he thought.

"Thought you wouldn't remember me," said Gale, scanning the room, "nice place."

Peeta shook his head, and couldn't help but smile. The room was a mess, the blankets on the floor, the walls a faded gray, even the small opening with its bars rusting looked horrifying. When he first arrived, Peeta couldn't even imagine falling asleep in here. Three years later, he couldn't imagine anywhere else.

"How did you know I was here?" Peeta asked, suddenly serious. But he knew there was another question that had to be asked, for better or for worse.

"Long story." Gale replied, crossing his arms.

"Trust me, I've got plenty of time." said Peeta, mimicking his gesture.

"That's not important right now." Gale said, and for a moment, his expression softened, "she's doing alright, in case you were wondering."

But that was the problem. Peeta did wonder, and sometimes too much. It did no good to hope for a future that would never happen, a future that would never come. But if Katniss was happy, wasn't that all that really mattered? That was all he had ever wanted for her. But things change, people change, and the only thing that kept Peeta Mellark going at this point was the hope that one day he would be able to see her smile once more.

"Are you two…" his voice cracked, barely more than a whisper.

Gale's expression hardened, "Together? We're married."

That was all it took. Three words for his world to crumble down. She wasn't just over him, if she had ever really loved him at all. No, Katniss Everdeen had moved on, leaving Peeta in the dust. _Katniss Hawthorne, _he corrected himself, and noticed how the two words just didn't seem right together.

"Peeta, listen. We may be together, but I see the way she looks at your picture, the sound of her voice when she mumbles your name in her sleep. She loves me, but not in the same way she loves you," he explained, and Peeta noticed the disappointment in his tone. What was he proposing? It did no good to tell him this, "the news hit her hard, and for a while, I didn't think she would get better. The other day though, she found your letter. Her eyes lit up, and she smiled for the first time in a long time. Peeta, you need her, and as much as I hate to admit it, she needs you."

"Gale, I–" Peeta tried to argue, but was interrupted by the shrill of an alarm. Red lights flashed through the hallway. It was just a matter of time before they came.

Gale grabbed his arm, suddenly alert. "Gale, you need to get out of here. Now." Said Peeta, shoving him towards the door. He didn't need to be held responsible for him too.

"You mean _we._" Gale held his arm, his grip firm. They fled the other direction, the sound of footsteps not far behind.

"What are you really doing here?" asked Peeta, stopping his tracks.

"Getting caught if you don't move." Gale smirked, "I came to bust you out."

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><p>Katniss paced back and forth, her expression worried. "Haymitch, where did he go?" she asked, shaking her head. Gale had not returned, and it was almost time to leave.<p>

"I don't know sweetheart," replied Haymitch, finishing up his breakfast. Gale would be fine, wherever that kid had gone. He would come back sooner or later. And besides, he could take care of himself, something he just didn't trust Katniss to do anymore. He never thought he'd see the girl that he used to know. The fearless huntress, the girl who was on fire, the symbol of rebellion. All that had vanished when Peeta had died. He could only hope this meant things could change.

For his sake, for Katniss's sake. It couldn't make things any worse than they already were.

But if one thing Haymitch had always known, when love and lies were mixed, even the ones who were unbreakable could do the thing nobody had ever expected.

They broke.


	10. Chapter 9: Lost

**A/N-Update! So, what did you guys think of the movie? Right now, The Hunger Games is the number one book, album, and movie in North America! Anyways, this one was written by iam97, hope you like it! R&R, andwant you want to check out our other stories!**

**~Bree**

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><p><strong><strong>Chapter 9:

She'd given up on moving. It didn't help. Neither did talking. Or screaming, for that matter. It wasn't as if she'd tried it, she just knew. Screaming wouldn't help after nightmares. Why should it now?

No, Katniss just sat there, on her bed, unmoving. The old parachute, from the second Quarter Quell, clutched tightly in her hands. It still held all the objects it had during the war.

A long time ago, that was what Katniss had thought it of. A reminder of the war that took everything away from her. On TV, they'd say Panem has been reconstructed. But they were wrong.

Yes, the shell was better. Of course, the President, Paylor, was good, the complete opposite of Snow. Although it had taken everyone a while to get used to the new politics, especially to a free election. Democracy. The land had lacked it for so long, it had been foreign the first time they'd used it.

But Katniss, and many other people, still suffered. The effects this war had on the population of Panem hadn't vanished. Katniss didn't think they ever would.

To others, perhaps. Some who hadn't been like her. But she'd been the Mockingjay. She'd been the girl on fire. Roles that were forced on her. She had been both, she had to admit that. The girl on fire, the girl who sparked the rebellion. The Mockingjay, the girl who was the symbol of the rebellion.

But that wasn't the question. The question was if she'd wanted to be either. And the answer to that was no, not after seeing the aftermath, not after seeing what it had done to her, to her family.

This brought her back to her current situation. Not only had they taken her sister, Finnick, Rue, Boggs, and so many others, no, they'd also taken Peeta away from her. She didn't know how, but if he really was still alive, and Katniss had come to think of that as a fact, Peeta Mellark was still alive, she just knew the old Capitol had something to do with it. Snow's last attempt at breaking her, even though at the point of time he died, Coin had done a pretty good job at that, and he had known.

And now Gale wasn't there anymore, and Katniss had no idea where to look for him. It was as though he had vanished.

The only thing that comforted her was that the odds that he'd died were slim. Surely they would have informed her, his wife, in that case.

Though, the possibility of his death…it wouldn't leave her. Maybe that's because she was, apparently, an angel of death. Whoever was close to her was bound to die. Maybe she should tell Haymitch, who was in the room next to hers, to run, run far away, and to never come back. Thinking of it, maybe that wasn't the worst idea. He wasn't really any help either way.

But then again, he was all she had left. Her mentor. How long would it take till her curse got him and destroyed him? Or was there anything to destroy? Had he anything left, anything except her?

She realized she was clutching the parachute even harder. Like a lifeline. It's what it had once been, all those years ago, in the Quarter Quell. A spile for water was what it had held.

Then, of course, a parachute could hold something destructive. A parachute with a bomb had destroyed her sister's life. And, of course, her own.

No matter if it helped or not, Katniss stood up and began pacing around again. Sitting was even worse. It felt like doing nothing. Even more than this.

"Sweetheart, this isn't going to help, you know?" Katniss felt like throwing a pillow at him. She knew that herself.

"Then what _is_, Haymitch? Nothing! Do you have any idea how I'm feeling right now? Do you…?" But she didn't bother saying more. No, there wasn't more to ask. Did he know how she felt? Yes, he did. His mother, his brother, his girl. All dead. And the letter must have given him hope, too. After all, Katniss knew he did love Peeta.

Haymitch shrugged. "Nothing. You're right. Except my pretty little friend here maybe." And there was actually a smirk on his lips, showing her he had already taken advantage of his 'pretty little friend', which was a bottle filled with liquor.

"Wanna take a sip?" His voice was slurring. Yes, he was definitely drunk. Katniss groaned. She did not need that now.

"Come back when you've sober!" But really, could she blame him? She, herself, wished for something to release the pain. And…escaping reality didn't sound too bad either.

But no. She has already done that once. And though she may not remember much of the night, but she certainly remembers the following morning. She shudders, not wanting to relive this. Plus…what problem had it solven, really?

"I am sober." He hiccupped. "Alright, sober by my standards. Consider this my state in your first Hunger Games. And I did pretty well as your mentor back then, didn't I?"

She let herself drop on the bed, frustrated. "Haymitch please. I…I can't deal with this right now." And then she let out another groan because she felt her eyes starting to tear.

She brought her hands up to cover her face. No, she wouldn't cry now. Maybe, if she kept telling herself, she wouldn't. She didn't want to. She didn't want to appear weak.

Deep down, of course, she knew she was. But she didn't want to accept it, especially not after this argument with Haymitch. Which hadn't nearly been the worst we ever had.

She felt the mattress sink further as someone sat down beside her. "I'm not going to lie. I'm not going to tell you it's going to be alright. I don't make promises I can't keep. I only tell you it'll get better. And Katniss…he'll come back to you. At least one of them."

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><p><strong>AN-Any suggestions, questions or comments are welcome. Review please!**

**~Bree**


	11. Chapter 10: The Fight

**_Disclaimer: I do not own the Hunger Games, no matter how much I wish I did._**

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><p><em>"In life there are two types of people, those who are worth living for, and those whom you cannot live without."<em>

_~Author Unknown_

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><p><strong><span>10<span>**

The casket wasn't empty. She knew it wouldn't be. But a small part of her could not help but hope that it was. And that Peeta Mellark was still out there, alive and well. She would have gone anywhere, have done anything just to get him back, take him home to District 12. But he really was gone. And now, there was no denying that.

There were no words to describe the pain. It was different than losing Prim, someone in which Katniss had witnessed die before her very eyes. Heard her voice, one last call for help, before that bomb had dropped. She never would have made it in time to save her sister, but knew that it was still her fault. Prim would have never been there in the Capitol, never would have been in District 13 if it weren't for the stunt that her older sister had pulled during the first Games.

Nightlock. Her sister would have still been alive if Katniss had never pulled out those berries. And perhaps, Peeta would be too. How could an act so small infinite the flames to a rebellion? How could one person have that much influence, that much fire, to make people go against the leader that haunted their nightmares, that took away their children's lives? She dd not know the answer.

Being told that he was dead was one thing. But to witness the body, one that used to have a heartbeat, a soul, one whose arms comforted her when she had a nightmare, one whose whispers were able to lull her back to sleep, was another. He had been the boy Katniss Everdeen had loved for so long, but now, her worse nightmare had come true. He was really gone.

But then, how could one explain the letter? She was too numb, too hollow, to want to understand, to want to know the truth. She had focused too much on the facts that the truth had slipped from her grasp, like the grains of sand in which fell from her hand when they stopped on the Victory Tour in District 4.

She had not bothered to analyze him clearly, not bothering to notice that he was holding in his hands the very locket that he had given her during the Quarter Quell. The one that she had lost during the war.

The one that which held a note that read: _September 21– always._

But just because she didn't look clearly didn't mean someone else couldn't have.

xXx

Haymitch. He read the paper, realizing what the boy had done. Somehow, someway, he had managed to sneak this piece of paper in there. He knew that they would find the letter, that they would come to look at the body. Peeta knew that eventually, they would find the paper.

It had no more than seventeen letters, and yet this held proof that the boy was still alive. It held evidence that they had faked a murder and had taken Peeta Mellark as their prisoner. But the one question that lingered in his mind that night, haunting his very dreams, was something he could not answer. Why?

He would tell the girl tomorrow. He would have too. Even if she didn't believe her mentor, even if she pushed him away, Katniss had the right to know.

He remembered what it was like to have to lose the girl he loved, to hear that his family had been in a accident just weeks after he returned from the arena. Drinking was the only thing that got him through the numbness, the nightmares. How two kids could go through the arena twice, fight a war, have their memories replaced and yet still manage to stay alive, he had no idea. The girl wasn't the real survivor anymore. They all were.

But could they survive what was to come?

He hoped so.

xXx

Peeta swore he felt his heartbeat pick up with every step he took, every move he made. He and Gale raced through the hallways, both of which were praying would not be swarming with guards each time they turned and entered a new one. Gale had disabled the alarms, but it had only been for a short while. He thought getting into the building would be easy, that nobody would even think of questioning the boy who defied everything he stood for just for the sake of getting the girl he loved.

He was dead wrong.

It took several minutes extra to sneak into the building, much less the room that Peeta Mellark was being held captive in. It was those extra minutes that could have cost them their lives if they had been found.

Gale stopped suddenly, even though the guards were trailing not far behind. Peeta could hear their footsteps echo throughout the halls, making it nearly impossible to tell which direction they were coming from.

"What are you doing?" Peeta whispered, but then noticed Gale crouching down, taking out what appeared to be a screwdriver in his left hand. And that was when it clicked.

He watched as Gale fumbled with the screws that kept the air vent shut tight. _He must have come this way after he was rejected by the guards, _he thought. _He designs snares that catch wild turkeys, and yet he can't open this?_

He heard the footsteps once more. Closer. They were getting closer.

_What if they didn't make it? What if they were taken and he was put right back into that cell, only this time there was no way out?_

He thought of his brothers, his father. How they were never as close as a family should be, but knew that they cared for one another deeply. He remembered his brother's words to him before he left on the train for the first arena. _"Peeta, you have to fight. You have to make it out."_

He recalled his response, how shaken up he had been afterward. "_You know I won't be able to make it out. Not with her in there with me too. Ky, I have to make sure she comes home. I don't care if it ends up taking my own life. I'm ready to die for her."_

His brother Ky was the only one who knew about Katniss, the only one he trusted the most to keep his secret. _"Peeta, the greatest things in life are worth fighting for, but are you sure that's her?"_

_"She's worth fighting for, Ky." _

He remembered his brother nodding, but saw the tears in his eyes as he spoke, said what he thought would be his last goodbye. _"Then fight hard."_

Gale was unscrewing the last one when three of the guards found the two boys. He did have to turn around to know that they were there, to know that their guns were loaded, ready to fire, ready to take a life if neccessary.

_"Then fight hard."_

He knew what he had to do, knew that this was what it would take if he was ever to return home. To District 12, to Haymitch. To Katniss. A ghost of a smile traced his lips at the thought of her.

He would fight. He would fight until his last breath, until his last heartbeat. He would fight, and he would fight hard.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: I am so, so, so sorry for not updating these past few months! D= My life has just been chaotic, but now things are finally settling down, which means I will have much more time for writing. This chapter is dedicated especially to those who have been waiting all this time for me to update. Once again, I feel horrible and I am so sorry about that. Anyways, what did you think? I personally think I'm a bit rusty 'cuz I haven't written for this story in a while. Comments, suggestions, or questions are always welcome :) Review or PM please! It makes my day to hear what you people think!**

**And have you guys heard of Sam Claflin being casted as Finnick? He's cute and all, and he is a decent actor, but I'm not sure if he will be able to pull off Finnick Odair. But I thought the same thing for Josh Hutcherson in the beginning, so who knows? He may end up surprising people.**

**And... if anyone would be interested in making a cover for this story, PM! I am horrible with designing covers D:**

**"Bree"**


	12. AN: Beta request

**Authors note: I don't have a beta. I honestly haven't talked to my old one in months because I took a break from fanfiction, but when I came back and tried to contact her she didn't respond. If anyone is interested, PM. I don't usually review my work considering I barely have time to even write, so a beta would be really helpful. **

**~Bree**


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